We are so very sorry.
If you are reading this, it likely means someone you love is no more. And now, on top of the grief and the shock, you are faced with a task that feels impossible: you have to plan a funeral. It can feel like you’re being asked to climb a mountain when you can barely stand up.
We understand. We really, truly do. For over 20 years, our family at Oliveira Funeral Home has sat with families in Vancouver just like yours. We’ve held their hands and helped them find a way forward.
So please, take a deep breath. You don’t have to figure this all out at once. This isn’t a business transaction. It is an act of love. We’ve written this guide to help you walk through it, one small step at a time.
Step 1: Please, Just Pause.
This is the most important step, and it’s one most people skip.
Before you pick up the phone, and before you make a single list, just stop. Breathe. The world can wait for an hour. You do not have to do everything in the next ten minutes.
If you are with family, take a moment to just be together. If you are alone, please call someone you trust. Make a cup of tea. There is no rush. Your only job in this first hour is to be kind to yourself. You are in shock. That is normal and it is okay.
Step 2: The First Few Calls (When You’re Ready)
When you feel you can, there are two practical things to do.
First, the legal part. If your loved one passed away at home or not under medical care, you will need to call 911. The authorities will help you with the next legal steps. If they passed away in a hospital or a care facility, the staff there will guide you and will make this call for you.
Second, the personal part. Call a few close family members or friends. You do not have to call everyone. Just one or two. Share the burden. Let them help you.
Step 3: Finding Your Guide (Calling a Funeral Home)
Your next call will be to a funeral home.
This phone call is not a test. You do not need to have any answers. Think of it this way: you are not calling to order a funeral. You are calling to ask for a guide.
In Vancouver, you have many options. Our advice? Don’t just look for a price list. Look for a feeling.
When you call, does the person on the other end sound kind? Are they patient? Do they listen to you, or do they rush you? At Oliveira Funeral Home, we believe our job is to listen first. We are here 24/7, and you can call us just to ask questions. You are not committing to anything.
Step 4: The First Meeting (It’s Just a Conversation)
We call this the “arrangement meeting,” but it’s really just a conversation. It’s us, sitting with you, and gently figuring out the next steps.
We will ask you some simple questions to handle the official paperwork, which is a legal requirement in British Columbia. Your funeral director will use this to register the death with BC Vital Statistics. This includes things like your loved one’s full legal name, their date and place of birth, their Personal Health Number, and their parents’ names. If you don’t have all of it right away, it is okay. We can help you with this.
You may also be asked for their Social Insurance Number. Please know this isn’t for the death certificate itself, but it allows us to help you with other important steps, like applying for the Canada Pension Plan Death Benefit. We can explain all of this clearly when we meet.
Then, we will talk about the two main choices: cremation or burial.
This is a big decision. But please know, there is no “wrong” answer. It is a deeply personal choice based on your faith, your family traditions, or what your loved one wanted. Our job is not to sell you one or the other. Our job is to explain the options clearly, from a traditional funeral service followed by burial, to the many different ways you can honour someone with cremation.
Step 5: How to Say Goodbye (Telling Their Story)
This is the part that matters most.
This is where we move beyond the usual stuff. A funeral is not about the type of casket or the colour of the flowers. It is about the person. It is about telling their story.
So, let’s not think of it as “planning a funeral”. Let’s think of it as “creating a goodbye”.
What did they love?
Did your dad love fishing? Maybe we could have a small bowl with his favourite lures by the guestbook.
Was your mom famous for her chocolate chip cookies? You could share her recipe on a small card for people to take home.
Did they love the Whitecaps? Or the Canucks? We can incorporate their team’s colours.
There are no rules. You can have a formal, traditional service in a church. You can have a small, quiet gathering in our chapel. You can have a celebration of life at a later date. You can play their favourite rock music. You can read a beautiful poem.
The best services we’ve ever been part of are the ones that truly feel like the person. We will help you find those small, perfect touches.
Step 6: The Practical Things We Handle for You
While you are focusing on the story, we will be handling all the logistics. This is our job, and we take it very seriously.
We will coordinate with the church, the cemetery, or the crematorium. We will prepare all the legal paperwork for the BC Death Certificate. We will help you write the obituary and place it online. You do not have to juggle these things. We will do it for you.
We will also talk to you about cost. We believe in being 100% transparent. We will give you a clear, itemized list and explain every single charge. There will be no pressure and no surprises.
(This is also why many families now choose to pre-plan their funerals, to remove this financial stress from their loved ones. It is something we can talk about anytime.)
Step 7: After the Service is Over
The funeral service is a single day. Your grief is a journey.
The world goes back to normal, but your world has changed. The weeks and months after the funeral can be the hardest.
Please know that the support doesn’t stop. You will need to take care of your heart. We have a list of grief resources on our website, including local Vancouver support groups, that can help. Please use them. Talk to people. Be gentle with yourself.
You Are Not Alone
Planning a funeral is a profound, final act of love. It is one of the hardest things you will ever do.
But you do not have to do it alone.
Take it one step, one decision, one breath at a time. And if you get stuck, just stop. Call us. We can help. Our family is here to serve your family. Please, reach out to us at Oliveira Funeral Home at (604) 942-7920 anytime, day or night.
Also Read:
Finding the Right Funeral Services in Vancouver Amidst the Grief
A Loving Goodbye: How To Make Funeral Arrangement Services Special
January 6, 2026
December 3, 2025
November 24, 2025
November 6, 2025
October 23, 2025
September 29, 2025
September 9, 2025
August 10, 2025
July 17, 2025
July 3, 2025
June 19, 2025
June 8, 2025
May 20, 2025
May 14, 2025
April 29, 2025
April 9, 2025
March 25, 2025
March 9, 2025
February 25, 2025
February 14, 2025
January 28, 2025
January 9, 2025
December 23, 2024
December 9, 2024
November 19, 2024
November 6, 2024
February 4, 2022
February 4, 2022
October 4, 2021
September 3, 2021
September 3, 2021
August 30, 2021
June 28, 2021
February 12, 2021
February 14, 2019
August 29, 2018
August 29, 2018
Oliveira Funeral Home is family-owned and operated. Please let us know if we can be of any assistance to you or your family. We are available 24 hours / 7 days a week to answer any questions you may have.